It’s the same every year. Spring is in the air again and I can feel it all over my body. It tickles, I’m getting restless and I can’t stop looking at all the lovely girls among the gulls that gather around the lakes in my neighbourhood. And as I watch the girls fly bye, I notice they are looking at me too and that exits me even more! I want to mingle and pick a nice gull to be my girl for this year. While I’m watching the gulls and consider to make my move, my mind lingers off to last year, when I met this stunning gull and took her out on a date.
I still remember the moment I saw this beautiful gull and said to myself ‘what a lovely girl, let’s take her out for diner!’. I am familiar with the fact that – with food-loving gulls – it almost always ends with them finishing your plate. But in the heat of the moment I couldn’t imagine that this fine-looking girl was the kind of gull that needs to have her pick of your dish to get her started. So we dressed up and went to a nice little place where the tables are set up in the middle of a nice little lake. I could feel the romance linger in the air, the sun started already setting and everything looked perfect for a lovely evening and maybe a promising night. We sat on a table (it sounds a bit odd but that’s what you do around here) and started to chat. We talked about this and talked about that and after a while we even started to talk about spending the summer together. I knew by then I was all into her and I felt she was getting into me too!
Meanwhile I finished my meal and was ready to order desert when the gorgeous gull leaned towards me and started to whisper in my ear. At that moment I thought I was at third base but then I realized she was just begging me to share my diner with her. She wanted to have a taste of what I had, she said, even though my plate was empty. And I knew right then and there what it meant 😳 . Against my better judgement I thought she was just joking but as she persisted I knew this was serious.
And there I was, caught in the middle… If I would ignore her begging, I knew romance would be over on her part. On the other hand, if I would give in I was not sure that I would feel romantic afterwards. Then Mother Nature lend me a hand to make my decision. The thought of me throwing up so she could have her pick made me feel really sick and before I knew I was regurgitating my main course. Much to her likings, she didn’t waist a second and went for the scraps that where on the table…again! And meanwhile I was kind enough to shade her from the sun a little as she enjoyed MY meal.
As soon as she finished she said ‘thank you’ and tried to kiss me. As she gently opened her mouth the smell of regurgitated fish got into my nostrils, and I felt I was going to be sick again. As far as I could remember I had never been reluctant to kiss a beautiful gull before but this poorly mannered girl was not going to be my summer love…I just didn’t have the stomach for it! 🙂
I feel a little shiver down my spine as I try to fade my memories. This year is going to be great and I take off to meet a nice little gull who is winking at me. Let’s find out about her manners, I feel hungry again!